Really?

To be real? or not to be real? That is the question I have asked myself for the past few weeks.  As I continue my journey of being authentic and real I came to understand that not everyone wants to be real with me. I realized that I can’t be real with everyone.

My  desire to be real and authentic is so that I am no longer hiding in myself imposed unworthiness, but I am accepting my faults and imperfection. Being real is being me, following my heart and not to become someone that people want me to be.…..so who do I be real with? Those friends that are open and safe, those feel compassion for my situation and those that honor (my) struggle. I’m looking for compassion, it’s about connecting with the right person at the right time about the right issue. (Brown. p. 11)

If not everyone wants to be real, why is that?

As I look to be real, I realize I need to be the type of person that people can be open and real with as well. I need to be the one that makes others feel safe. I need to give compassion. That I accept people, we are all growing, all struggling. Maybe I give a sense of judgment or lack of acceptance.

But, it isn’t just about me being real, but for me to cultivate a spirit that allows others to choose the journey as well. I feel that being real will bring less conflict with others and more empathy and compassion for others at least for me.

Becoming Jayne really…….

Loving me is loving others

When we love a person, we accept him or her exactly as is: the lovely with the unlovely, the strong with the fearful the true mixed in with the façade, and of course, the only way we can do it is by accepting ourselves that way.

I read this quote from Fred Rodger of Mister Rodgers Neighborhood and his words speak to the core of self love in order to love others.

I need to give myself positive self talk, laugh at my mistakes, accept that I am enough with my faults and imperfections.

I always thought that loving others has nothing to do with loving me….love to others is giving to others easy right? Maybe not so much. The love I have to give others needs to come from a place of compassion within my soul. A gentleness with me, then I have a gentleness with others, forgiveness of me, allows me to forgive others, love of self. Then I can love others with true compassion.

Becoming Jayne loving me first......